


The Warlock Who Ran Away

by sushishin



Series: Camelove 2021: Gillventures [5]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Canon Era, Episode Tag, Episode: s02e09 Lady of the Lake, Freya Lives (Merlin), Happy Ending, Merlin Leaves Camelot (Merlin), Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 03:54:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29395812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sushishin/pseuds/sushishin
Summary: He’s tired of being careful, of hiding, of making himself small.Merlin frees a druid girl from her cage, and everything changes.
Relationships: Freya/Gilli (Merlin), Freya/Gilli/Merlin (Merlin), Freya/Merlin (Merlin), Gilli/Merlin (Merlin)
Series: Camelove 2021: Gillventures [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2150928
Comments: 6
Kudos: 18
Collections: Camelove 2021





	The Warlock Who Ran Away

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Camelove 2021 - Day 5: The More the Merrier
> 
> This is a sequel to my Day 1 story, 'The Bastet and the Finch', but you don't need to read it for this to make sense. Basically, Freya is cursed to be a bastet at night, and Gilli is cursed to be a goldfinch during the day.

There is a girl in the cage. 

Her dress is torn, her hands in chains, her face is pale and streaked with dirt, and _she’s just a girl_. Merlin can’t just let her stay there to die. What is the point of his magic, if he can’t save his people? 

He returns just after dawn. 

With a word, the lock snaps open, and he’s grabbing her hands, breaking the chains, pulling her out of the cage, urging her to move: _please, I won’t hurt you, let me help you_. She looks doubtful, but follows him. There’s not too many about at this hour, and Merlin manages to bring her to the catacombs without being seen. It’s not a long term solution, but he can’t think of what to do next, and at least she’ll be safe, for now. “I’ll be back, later,” he tells her, “You need to stay here - but I’ll bring food.” 

She steps away from him, twists her arms tightly around herself. Goddess, but what has she gone through? “Why are you doing this?”

“It could’ve been me,” he says, “In that cage.” It _had_ been him, not too long ago, and thinking of the witchfinder is not pleasant. But he must not forget: every minute in Camelot, he’s in danger. He conjures some lights, hovers fire in the air. 

Her expression softens, and some of the tension in her body eases. “Thank you,” she says quietly.

“I’m going to look after you, I promise,” he says. He should be going soon - but there’s the pull of a kindred spirit, and Merlin doesn’t want to leave. “I’m Merlin,” he says.

She hesitates, then, “I’m Freya.” 

It’s a beautiful name. _Freya_. He smiles at her. “I’ll see you later, Freya,” he says, and she doesn’t answer.

* * *

The rest of the day, Merlin’s distracted; his thoughts keep straying down to the catacombs, to the girl hiding there. _She’s a druid_ , warns the bounty hunter, _who has been cast out; she terrifies them_ \- he’s clearly lying. Why would the druids do such a thing? The bounty hunter is just upset that he would not have his reward. 

Merlin manages to secure her some sausages and some bread, and has to resist the urge to steal away to visit her, right after lunch. He knows he has to help her escape, soon; all the guards are on lookout. It’s not safe; not that it ever would be safe for her in Camelot. 

His heart is oddly light when he finally manages to get away from the castle in the evening. Maybe they could talk? He hasn’t been able to talk, properly, openly, with another person with magic. He wants to get to know her. Maybe she could be someone who could really understand him - 

He stops. _She’s not there._ How did they find her? No - Merlin would have heard if she had been recaptured; he has to find her before the guards do - but where would she have gone? Why would she have left? He rushes out into the night: it’s quiet, most people already in their homes. Maybe she was heading out the gates, that would make sense - 

A high pitched scream pierces the air, then cuts off abruptly, and Merlin runs towards it. 

Merlin isn’t proud of it, but when he sees the blond hair, his first thought is to be thankful it’s not Freya. At any rate, he’s too late - they’re dead; deep gouges all over their bodies. Above them prowls a winged beast with the body of a cat; its paws drenched in their blood. It turns towards him. He stops, heart pounding, waiting, desperately thinking of what he could do - there’s a barrel, over there, he could throw it with his magic - 

In the corner of his eye, Merlin sees movement from across the street. He doesn’t want to take his eyes from the beast, but it doesn’t seem to matter: it’s no longer paying attention to him. There’s a man, inching slowly towards the beast, hands outstretched, making shushing noises. “Shhh, it’s alright,” he’s saying, “Come here, it’s alright, Fr - ” 

Somewhere, a door slams, and the sound of boots on the cobblestones, and the beast takes to the air, wheeling about in a large arc before flying towards the outside gates. The man yells, and starts running after it. Merlin barely thinks before following - he knows that somewhere, Freya is in danger, but something about this doesn’t make sense. 

Miraculously, they don’t run into any guards as they leave the gates, then they’re out of the city, and into the forest. Merlin’s chest is heaving with exertion, and the beast is so far ahead, but the man doesn’t stop for a moment, running with single minded determination. 

Finally, the beast must tire, and seems to almost droop out of the sky. The man puts on a burst of speed, and Merlin falls back for a moment. When he catches up, the beast is in the middle of a small clearing head bowed, and the man is murmuring at the beast, soft, shushing noises, as if it were a wild stallion. “Shh, it’s alright, _gods, I’m so sorry_ , it’s okay, Freya, come on…” 

_Freya?_ Merlin doesn’t realise he had spoken aloud, but the man whirls to face Merlin. It made sense, now.

“Who are you?” The man straightens, stands in front of the beast, as if to protect it. 

“I’m not here to hurt you,” says Merlin. “My name’s Merlin - ”

The man nods absently, looking up at the trees, and suddenly, Merlin hears the _crack_ of the branch above him. He laughs as he jumps backwards before it falls onto him. _Another sorcerer_ , he thinks almost gleefully. The man snarls, but Merlin throws his hands up in supplication. 

“Look,” he says, “I’m like you.” Slowly, Merlin lowers his hands, and brings them together. He whispers into his cupped hands, then opens his palms, showing the man the flickering flame. 

“Do you think, just because you have magic, that I can trust you?” he scoffs. “Who do you think did this to us in the first place?”

“I just want her to be safe,” he says. “Please, let me help.”

The man folds his arms, and his rough, almost as if he is unused to speaking this much. “You can help by leaving her alone. She’s been through enough.”

A thought that’s been churning in his mind is suddenly clear: he’s a danger to everyone he loves, always on the brink of being discovered, but perhaps with these two, he doesn’t have to hide, he doesn’t have to be scared. They would _understand_ \- with them, he can be himself. 

“Let me go with you,” he says, and he’s not begging, but… “Please.” He’s so, so tired. 

The man stares at him, considering, then he shrugs. “Do you have any paper?” 

Merlin shakes his head, confused. “What do you need it for?”

“Dawn’s coming,” he says, as if that explains anything. “And this isn’t just my decision to make.” He shakes his head. “Never mind, I’ll think of something. My name’s Gilli, by the way.”

“Will you be here if I come back in the morning?”

Gilli looks Merlin over. “Probably,” he says. “Come back in the morning with some rope, and if you can convince Freya, we’ll talk.” 

Merlin slips into his room without incident, but he’s too agitated to sleep; his mind is awhirl. He gets up, and packs: blankets, his spellbook, and some paper, just in case. 

* * *

In the morning, he barely makes it through breakfast before making his excuses to Arthur - _Gaius needs me today, you’ll survive without me, sire_ \- and heading towards the forest. 

Freya’s sitting in the clearing, head resting on her knees, staring at nothing; a goldfinch perches on her shoulder. 

“Freya,” he says, dropping to his knees beside her, and after a long moment, she turns towards him. 

“You came back.”

Of course he did. “I promised I’d help you.”

“ _I killed those people_ ,” she whispers, “Merlin, you have to leave me. I’m a monster, I’m not safe.”

Merlin leans in close. “I know how it feels to be afraid of what you are,” he insists. “But you don’t have to be. I know how you feel.”

Freya doesn’t say anything. “I don’t want to be scared anymore, either.”

At that, she nods. “Okay,” she says. “Are you sure you want to come with us?”

He says yes with no doubt in his heart. Her eyes crinkle at the corners, when she smiles. “I should start moving, then,” she says. “I can only travel during the day, but you can catch up, can’t you?” 

“Wait - where’s Gilli?”

The goldfinch flutters over to rest on Merlin’s knee. 

* * *

He tells Gwen that he’s leaving, and she asks him _why_ , but he doesn’t answer. _Don’t be a stranger_ , she says, _you’ll come back someday, won’t you?_ She presses some bread and fruit into his hands. 

He tells Gaius that he’s leaving, and he doesn’t lie when Gaius asks if it’s the druid girl. _It’s not safe, Merlin_ , he says, but it’s Merlin’s decision to make, and he accepts it in the end. 

He doesn’t tell Arthur. What could he possibly say? He’s tired of being careful, of hiding, of making himself small; why must this prophecy force him to give all of himself while Arthur is in the dark? 

He leaves a note.

Arthur will find it in the morning, but he’ll be gone by then. 

* * *

It’s late when he finds Gilli in the forest. One of Freya’s paws has been tied to a tree, but she seems calm, padding around in circles in the grass. Gilli has his arms folded across his chest, looking at her with an odd expression on his face. “She doesn’t fight it, if she’s not tied up so much,” he says. 

He tilts his head towards the ground, and Merlin looks to see some words carefully scratched into the dirt. “I don’t know what you told her,” he says. “But I guess you’re coming with us. Are you sure you’re up for it?”

* * *

Sometimes, Merlin feels like he’s abandoned everyone, and he misses Camelot so much that he cannot breathe. But over the weeks, it dulls to an ache. It’s nothing compared to how _free_ he is, now. Of course he can’t do magic all the time, but still - he hadn’t noticed how tightly wound he was, at Camelot. 

Slowly, his companions open up to him. 

During the day, he walks with Freya, and she tells him of her village: the dizzying height of the mountains, the lake, the flowers in summer. She tells him that she misses seeing the moon and the stars. 

One day, she tells him of a man who wouldn’t take no for an answer, and of his mother’s rage. She tells him of the guilt she keeps buried, deep down, of bringing Gilli into this: he had seen the sorceress follow Freya out to the lake, and had tried to interrupt her curse. 

She tells him that they were hoping to find the druids, because they might know how to break the curse. But she was too obvious, and was caught; and Gilli was in no shape to help her.

At night, Gilli talks, and talks, and talks, until his voice goes hoarse. It’s like years of conversation are pouring out of him, all at once. He talks of Freya, and how they met; of trying to win her over by finding berries, and going swimming in the lake. 

He talks about his own guilt: he’s just a bird, his transformation is harmless; he doesn’t have the fear that he may kill someone. “We’ve chained her up, every night, since the beginning,” he says. “After the first night - we didn’t _know_ it was the chains hurting her, making her panic - we thought it was keeping her safe - ”

“You couldn’t have known,” says Merlin, as he thinks, _three years_ , “It’s not your fault.”

Merlin tells him about Ealdor, and his mother, and about Will, and doesn’t move away when Gilli puts his hand on his shoulder, and squeezes it. “I’m sorry,” he says. “We should visit, someday.”

But the best part of all is the joy in Gilli’s face when he shows off his magic, makes sparks dance around the campfire, makes horses out of the smoke. Sometimes they even practice, poring over the spells in Merlin’s book: they try to make the grass grow faster; they change the colour of each others’ hair. But there’s nothing in the book about breaking the curse. 

* * *

It happens so slowly, Merlin barely notices it.

But one day, he wakes up, and sees Freya’s face in the light of dawn, and he almost feels sick, with how much he _wants_. But there’s nothing to be done, so he closes his eyes and puts it aside. What he wants is for both of them to be happy: for their curse to be broken. He’s imagining it, probably, when Freya seems to walk a little closer to him. 

The night is cold, and Gilli and Merlin sit close to the embers of the fire, having exhausted themselves trying to keep it alive without any smoke. He should get some sleep soon; he tries to sleep in the early hours of the morning, so he can spend time with both of them. Gilli shifts a little closer, a warm presence at Merlin’s side. He can stay up a little longer.

And then one day, Freya sits next to him as they’re packing up camp. 

“Merlin.” She seems to struggle with something to say. Then she places a hand on his knee. 

He stares at it in shock. Surely this can’t be happening? He wants her so much, he wants them both, but - his laugh is almost hysterical. “What about Gilli - ”

“It’s okay. He knows.” Merlin looks up, and her eyes are kind, with no trace of a lie. Freya smiles. “I haven’t spoken to him in person for years,” she says, “But you know we write. Lately, we’ve been writing a lot about you - and how much we love you, Merlin.”

He feels warm, he can barely think - he never even thought he could have this - and there’s guilt gnawing at his stomach, that he can have this, and they can’t have it with each other -

“Freya, I - ” He doesn’t know what to say, and so he just takes her hand. She sighs, then leans forward and kisses him, and the only thing running through his mind is _why can’t we have this, you should be able to have this, always, not just during the daylight_. 

They laugh when they finally break apart, and surge back together again. 

Later, she doesn’t seem to want to let him go: she tangles their fingers together, runs a hand up and down his arm, plays with his hair. At one point, her smile is sly. “Tonight,” she says, “You should kiss him for me.”

He shivers. 

But when the sun sets, she doesn’t transform. Instead, it’s just Gilli, standing, blinking at them both - “ _Freya?_ ”

Freya is staring at her hands, and she looks up, chokes. “Your hair - ”

“ _Your_ hair!”

“How is this possible - ”

They run at each other, and there’s crying, and Merlin stands to the side, his heart warm. Then Freya looks up, extends a hand, and there’s two sets of arms wrapping around him. _Thank you,_ they’re whispering, _thank you._

When they calm down, Gilli asks him how he did it. 

“I don’t know,” says Merlin. “I don’t know if it’s even me - ”

“Of course it was,” says Gilli confidently. “So what did you do, earlier?”

Merlin feels his face heat, huffs out a breath. “Er - we kissed,” he says. 

Gilli grins. “Okay then,” he says. “Kiss me.” 

He does, and the sun rises, and nobody transforms.

* * *

They say true love’s kiss can break even the strongest of curses. 

* * *

In the mornings, Gilli likes to sit and let the sun warm his face. He’s the earliest of them to rise, and he sits between them, one hand resting lightly on Merlin’s back, another gently stroking Freya’s hair. 

Merlin thought he felt free before, but it’s nothing, compared to this. 

In the evenings, Freya lies down in Merlin’s lap, while Gilli wraps an arm around his shoulders and holds her hand. 

They look up, and see the stars. 

**Author's Note:**

> This one really got away from me. 
> 
> Thanks for reading, and comments are always appreciated! :)


End file.
